Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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