I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
