how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
There's even glitter on my cock...
Randomize