There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
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