Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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