She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
Randomize