Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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