Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
