***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Nothing like coming home and finding the nearly full bottle of fireball you forgot you had stashed before your trip
It's the little things
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
Randomize
