used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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