are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
17 year olds will be the death of me.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
Liquor doesn't fix sad, but it sure as hell lowers my standards for a rebound.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Randomize