You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
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