i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
