i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
