We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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