I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
im holly from the hills drunk
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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