their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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