Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Randomize
