Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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