Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
