Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
God, I missed his penis.
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