Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
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