I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
