somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I can't turn off my feet"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Randomize
