she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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