When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
