My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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