Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
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