What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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