I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
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