South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
