Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
The beer is more important than you right now.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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