fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
