yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Another day, another engagement, another cat
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize