Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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