i barfeds in our rink
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize