"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
he stopped mid makeout and said "can I pray for you?"
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
