he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
She's like the female version of the Momento guy. She keeps forgetting that I'm an asshole after we have sex.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
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