another moral hangover. fuck.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
