should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
