help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
It's Friday. Sex?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
