she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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