he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Randomize