If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
So on a scale of 1 to Friendship-Over, how mad would you be if a rando I brought home sharted on the shag carpet in the living room?
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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