Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
