pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize