We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
You work out of a Hotel?
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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