whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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