Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
