That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Randomize
